In Vino Veritas?

The phrase "in vino veritas" is usually translated as "the truth is in wine" and is used to imply that when a person is drunk, they're more honest. As far as the translation goes, I'm not too sure about it, because there's no verb there at all. From what I know of Latin, it should be literally translated as "the truth in wine." Maybe it was originally "in vino veritas est" and "est" simply got dropped as the phrase travelled through the centuries. Or maybe there's something about Latin that I don't know yet.

But more important than the translation is the idea behind it. Am I more honest when I drink? Well, I do say things that I wouldn't say when I'm sober. But is that really honesty? It seems to me that choosing when, where, how, and to whom you say certain things is as important as what you actually say. So if wine (or any other alcoholic beverage) makes me say something that I normally wouldn't, it's not actually making me honest... In fact, it makes me dishonest, because I would usually have the tact to avoid saying certain things.

No, that doesn't make any sense at all... maybe I'm being dishonest to my own sense of tact and social graces, but that doesn't mean that I'm not telling the truth. Just because I normally wouldn't say something doesn't mean it's not the truth. So yes, I think that there is truth in wine.

Is this a good thing? I usually end up feeling embarassed by something I've said after drinking, and I certainly don't like feeling embarassed. This blog itself is a perfect example of this. Most posts I make while drunk are deleted the next morning, and the ones that aren't I'll end up feeling vaguely unhappy about until they're safely out of sight and out of mind. (Like the post just before this one...) Yeah, drunken rambling is something I don't enjoy dealing with once I'm sober again.

But why not? Why do I worry about it at all? Isn't honesty the best policy? Shouldn't I be trying to get rid of these social inhibitions anyway? Yes, no more lying, no more facades, no more pretending to be happy when I'm sad, or sad when I'm happy, or any one other of a myriad of emotions when it's not real. Yes, drunkenness is the greatest thing that's ever happened to me.

Or perhaps not. Perhaps there is a good reason for me trying to hide certain feelings. Perhaps there are parts of me, feelings or urges that I have that should remain concealed. And that's why I delete my drunken blogs. Because the social inhibitions have a very real and very positive function in my life. Because the checks that we place on ourselves, the checks that are ignored when one drinks, are part of what enables society to function.

Johnathan Swift wrote a poem detailing the process of a woman going about her daily chores to make herself presentable and beautiful. He said in his poem that the beauty is only skin deep, and anyone who has seen a women go through this process or cleaning and beautification would only find the finished product to be disgusting, considering the filth from whence it came. This is Mr. Swift's position on the matter, but after some reflection, it really is poor position to take. Maybe the underlying thing isn't beautiful, but there is a process for beautifying the unbeautiful. The fact that beauty is a facade for an ugly reality doesn't make the beauty any less beautiful.

This is where this tangent joins my earlier discussion - being completely honest simply for the fact that being anything else is only covering the filthy truth is silly. Or is it? Maybe I'm just trying to escape the reality that seems so ugly to me. Is this why I get depress when I drink? Because I'm honest with myself as well as with everyone else, and honesty is depressing? It's a distinct possibility.

Of course, I have to wonder which is better: being happy and dishonest with myself, or being sad and truthful. Perhaps there's a third option: truthful, but able to find the beauty in the truth, and thus happy. I think I'll have to think this one over, and take a more careful look at the world before I can say that any of these three options are the case.

I probably should have thought about this before I started writing about it. But to be quite honest, I don't think I would have ever gotten to this point if I hadn't been writing. That's the beauty of blogging. And of course, I really doubt that I would have gotten to this point if I hadn't been so drunk.

Maybe this is one drunk blog that I won't delete and I won't feel ashamed of. Tomorrow morning will tell.