The night has been interesting enough. Obviously, I'm drunk. I've been drunk since 7 or so. While I've been drunk, the following things have happened:
1. I got over the girl who I had posted about earlier (I'm done even thinking about it).
2. I, of course, found a new girl to wish I could have.
3. I saw my Big (my fraternity big brother) drunk. This isn't a rare occurrence, but I haven't seen it before, believe it or not. Well, I take that back. This is the first time that I've seen him drunk while I was sober enough to recognize him as such. Last weekend I was way too gone to know what was going on.
4. I actually returned to the party after having left it once.
5. I drank a 40 for the first time. King Cobra baby!
6. I had an honest conversation about hot chicks with a drunk friend. He's a buff guy who you wouldn't think would have any trouble getting girls. But he asserts that I would have an easier time picking up chicks than he would. I've heard this from enough people now that I'm beginning to think that maybe it's true... maybe all I need to do is try harder.
7. I can't wait until next semester. My suitemate from this semester will probably be living next door. Fucking sweet. I hope he decides to pledge next semster, though I don't want him to make that decision under pressure from me.
8. I smell like a campfire.
Time warp...
So so so strange. Spring is a time for new things, but recently I've been going back to things from the past. Musically, I've been listening to emo stuff for some odd reason. For the most part, I was done with that last year. Computing-wise, I'm considering venturing back into the realm of source-based distrobutions. Lunar linux in particular has caught my eye. I used it for a few months last year, and liked it, but Slackware called me back because Lunar had some issues, but over a year has gone by... I would probably be running it already if it weren't for the fact that summer is coming, and with it the lack of broadband. If I can't download fast, why bother with doing anything to the computer, much less installing a source-based distro? Also, I don't want to do anything with my computer because of ffsearch. There are enough people using it nowadays that I don't have the heart to take it down.
Anyway, enough computer talk. Exams are here, and with them the inevitable guilt. I know I should study, but I simply can't bring myself to put forth the effort. I'll probably have solid Bs in all of my classes. Oh well.
I went back home and visited some of my high school teachers today. When I told my senior English teacher that I pledged a fraternity, her jaw almost hit the floor. I think her exact response, once she managed to compose herself, was "I would have lost money on that one." I'm still not exactly sure why people are so surprised by this. Maybe I have changed more since high school than I thought.
Meh. I don't feel like writing anything more.
Anyway, enough computer talk. Exams are here, and with them the inevitable guilt. I know I should study, but I simply can't bring myself to put forth the effort. I'll probably have solid Bs in all of my classes. Oh well.
I went back home and visited some of my high school teachers today. When I told my senior English teacher that I pledged a fraternity, her jaw almost hit the floor. I think her exact response, once she managed to compose herself, was "I would have lost money on that one." I'm still not exactly sure why people are so surprised by this. Maybe I have changed more since high school than I thought.
Meh. I don't feel like writing anything more.
drunk blogging!
My first experience with drunk blogging. Actually, I'm not drunk anymore, but hey, I can pretent. I've decided that next semester will be great, and that summer won't be nearly as bad as I thought it might be. Next year will be great because I'll be living off campus (in the fraternity house, no less). I assumed that this summer would be bad because last summer was miserably boring. But I've realized that this summer I have some things going for me that I didn't last year. First of all, I'll have friends from college within reasonable driving distance. That alone will be an immediate improvement, but on top of that, I'll have a few highschool friends sticking around this year who were off doing different things last year. We'll see. Well, I'm tired. I've been drunk since 5, so I'm off to bed. I would wax eloquent about some pseudo-philosophical topic like I've done in the past posts, but I'm not feeling it tonight. Oh well. To quote my neighbor from last year, "I got no one to impress."
Bah!
I've decided that my research essay, which is due on Monday, won't be started until Sunday evening. It's nice to be able to decided that and still not worry about quality suffering. The topic practically writes itself, so no worries at all. However, I do have two exams on Monday. Oh well. Moving right along: the Postal Service has recently become one of my favorite bands. I'm considering putting together another "perfect CD," which is exactly 80 minutes of my favorite songs, and "Sleeping In" is definitely going to be on it. Or maybe "Such Great Heights." If I actually do get around to putting together such a CD, maybe I'll post the song list here. That seems like something that a normal blogger would do. Is it? Am I just trying desperately to fit in? Oh well, who cares? I'll do what I want with my own blog space. It's my corner of the world, where I can disseminate the thoughts and ideas that I wish. But I want to be read. Does that mean that I SHOULD do what everyone else does in a blog? No, that makes no sense. If I change my posts to be reader friendly, then I don't really want people to read them anyway. Really, the only option that I have is to do what I want, and hope people find it interesting. If they don't, fuck 'em. At least I'm not a sell out. GAH! That touches a sore spot, because I am a sell out in one sense. I wore one of the American Eagle shirts for the first time today. Considering what a drastic change in apparel this is for me, I definitely feel like a sell out. At least I didn't buy the shirt. It's put me in something of a quandry, too. Most everyone told me that I looked good. Even people who don't normally comment on peoples' appearances. So should I keep wearing it, and be a sell out? And am I even more of a sell out if I wear the shirt at college, where people think it looks good, but don't wear it back home, where people will think I've sold out? Will I be a hypocrite, and a fake person? The answers aren't comfortable ones. I think I'll go back to my highschool method of dressing: wearing whatever's clean and within reach. I'd be fooling myself if I said that I still don't care about what I wear, but I can at least pretend that such petty matters are beneath me. What a life.
a cold day in hell...
I'm going to go to bed after I write this. A careful observer would realize that this means that I'm going to go to bed before 1AM. Hence the post title.
I heard someone say recently that essays and works of prose are never finished, they are just abandoned. I think the truth of this will become more and more apparent to me as I blog. My first post is a prime example of a bit of writing that was abondoned in its infancy. Given a bit of time and thought, it would have become an exploration of the deep desire for humans to publish their thoughts. I should have gone on about how blogging is the first real way for people to publish while possessing merely mediocre writing skills. This in turn could have turned into a rumination of how such an explosion of ideas is bound to have untold consequences. I ought to have asked whether or not the blogging phenomenon will let people express deep philosophical thoughts that would otherwise have been buried in their thinker's ineloquence. Of course, I should then have answered in the negative, asserting that the ability to write well is the hallmark of having an intelligent and well developed thought. I should have explained that if you are unable to express your great idea, then that idea isn't great, because it isn't well formed enough for you to explain it. But I didn't do any of these things, and now I'm kicking myself for it. C'est la vie.
On a tangent, but more mundane note, I've decided to once again brave the cold, dark world of foreign languages. After my one horrible semester of French, that language is out of the question, and I had thought that ANY language was similarly unthinkable. This led me to change from an English major (a major which, in a display of cruel irony, requires three semesters of a foreign language) to some sort of science major. But now, due to influence from my dad and my religion professor, I've decided to try (drumroll...) Latin. That's right, I'm giving up the language of love for a language that has only been spoken by scholars for centuries. I don't know how it will work out, but it will certainly be interesting.
If I actually pass and enjoy Latin (which actually seems fairly likely), I'll take the next two sememsters of it, which in turn means that I'll be able to be an English major again. Thus, the progression of my choice of majors will look something like this:
1st semester: Computer science
2nd semester: Undecided
3rd semester: English
4th semester: Biology/Math
5th semester: English
That's enough indecision to make anyone want to curl up under their covers and pray that they don't dream.
I heard someone say recently that essays and works of prose are never finished, they are just abandoned. I think the truth of this will become more and more apparent to me as I blog. My first post is a prime example of a bit of writing that was abondoned in its infancy. Given a bit of time and thought, it would have become an exploration of the deep desire for humans to publish their thoughts. I should have gone on about how blogging is the first real way for people to publish while possessing merely mediocre writing skills. This in turn could have turned into a rumination of how such an explosion of ideas is bound to have untold consequences. I ought to have asked whether or not the blogging phenomenon will let people express deep philosophical thoughts that would otherwise have been buried in their thinker's ineloquence. Of course, I should then have answered in the negative, asserting that the ability to write well is the hallmark of having an intelligent and well developed thought. I should have explained that if you are unable to express your great idea, then that idea isn't great, because it isn't well formed enough for you to explain it. But I didn't do any of these things, and now I'm kicking myself for it. C'est la vie.
On a tangent, but more mundane note, I've decided to once again brave the cold, dark world of foreign languages. After my one horrible semester of French, that language is out of the question, and I had thought that ANY language was similarly unthinkable. This led me to change from an English major (a major which, in a display of cruel irony, requires three semesters of a foreign language) to some sort of science major. But now, due to influence from my dad and my religion professor, I've decided to try (drumroll...) Latin. That's right, I'm giving up the language of love for a language that has only been spoken by scholars for centuries. I don't know how it will work out, but it will certainly be interesting.
If I actually pass and enjoy Latin (which actually seems fairly likely), I'll take the next two sememsters of it, which in turn means that I'll be able to be an English major again. Thus, the progression of my choice of majors will look something like this:
1st semester: Computer science
2nd semester: Undecided
3rd semester: English
4th semester: Biology/Math
5th semester: English
That's enough indecision to make anyone want to curl up under their covers and pray that they don't dream.
It's worth a shot...
Why do people blog? This isn't rhetorical. I really don't know. I'm not a regular blog reader myself. I occasionally skim friends' blogs, just to see what it's all about, and to see if they mention me. (They hardly ever do, but that's to be expected.) From my small knowledge of blogs in general, I feel ill-equiped to understand what prompts people to record their everyday lives and thoughts for complete strangers to pour over. The cynic in me says that it's because they want to believe someone is actually reading about them and caring about them. Thinking about this a bit more, and considering my own motivations for blogging, I realize that this is no small part of my own forray. But maybe there is more to it than that... In English lecture, I've been told that life is just a series of random events until it's put into a narrative form, at which point it has meaning. Maybe blogging is the most modern and hip method for people to make sense of their lives. It's a nice thought. But in my case, I think it's probably a lie, because I didn't even consider it until I was halfway through my first post, desperately searching for some way to explain my blogging beyond just wanting to believe that someone cares.